Friday, July 08, 2005

TINS, SINS, DITS, ZENS et al..

I remember reading an article in a local daily a short while back about the increasingly demanding (present day) careers/jobs that the youth and the middle age group of India are pursuing or are already metaphorically neck deep into and the subsequent impact of it on the perennial institution called family. So its not uncommon now then that both hubby and wife are working the universal standard hours of 9-5 or later hours and the house is usually a place for a stop over in the 21st century as a friend, read as rags, put it :) ..

So what impact does it have on the denizens of the land of Kama Sutra asks/says the news piece.. How are the couples, new, the saute, the old and the wannabes coping with it all..Does Sex get to have its share of the spoils, is it merely sought as instant gratification, nay as an aftermath to a make up session that follows a sparring match, or is it really an often conjugal sublime, of emotions that transcend understanding, of love that transcends infatuation... or simply platonic love:).. Open a can of worms, yet you wont find the answer, eh !

Yes, hubby in one land, the career wife in yet another part of the sphere, exchanging calls, meeting on fortnights at a venue other than home, catching red eye flights, not seeing each other for a few days even though they work in the same town etc seems to be common and mutually acceptable by both.. Gym sessions have to be adhered too, the doc has to be seen for the mild throb in the head, bills paid on the net.. The Wheel of Fortune has to keep rolling, corporate ladders seem to be getting taller with more rungs to ascend... The Pay off ? Kids and the popcorn at the movies can wait, let alone relatives and the leisurely stroll in the park..I dont know, is it really so much as the newsprint proclaims ?? That too in India .. hmm.. They have to write something, so there.. To dwell upon this, it goes on to categorize the people, read as couples or singles into groups based on some amusing acronyms... So then,broadly put , we have the following, based on the premise that all this is caused by the rigors of the job dictated life, the net you can't get out of and if left unattended to, it can grow into an ugly acme and have repercussions
(None of them my views) :

1) DINS/TINS - Double /Two Incomes, No Sex
2) SINS - Single Income, No Sex
3) DITS - Double Income,Total Sex ( mischievously modified to TITS )
4 ) SITS - Single Income, Total Sex .. The Real Winner, The Dude(or the Dudette) eh !!

DINS/TINS group:
Miranda Warning is on, the moment has passed and it aint happening ! Pepul , pls you should hold back on some of your really critical tasks, take a stock of the situation so as to say and talk to some damned counsellor or Madam Ruth who makes a quick buck often, merely by telling 2 ppl to get cannon loose on one another and make up for lost time.. Seriously, whats the world coming to..
2 adults going to an older(wizened ?) adult to be told to mate.. !!
Heck, and to think there are others who just neednt want to be told not to :)

But its imperative its done.. Be gung ho on this as you are about work.. Make it Happen.. Read and try whatever, take a break, renew erotica vows, hit the boondocks, even resort to ajji leha.. But pls drop down to a milder zone maybe... Here I coin new zones/groups that I am patenting .. DILS, DIMS, TIMS etc... L for Little, M for Moderate.. Bless your souls though if you make it to the DITS zone :))

SINS :
Well, what can be said.. there are so many reasons to go into.. the archetypal Indian Male would be an avowed celibate till suhaag raat, a thing my roomie in Miami, Nikhil Iyer,called as hopelessly unfortunate, singular to one of the most populated democracies in the world and a cause -effect perhaps .. :)) .. Of what it is to tell repeated phirangi dates that at ages 25-27 and above that we are total greenhorns and to be giggled at and asked incredulously if anything was wrong..Why now!! Else to draw away befuddled, a mountain of ethos imposed on the conscience by the holier than thou angels ... if one were to get that far.. !

So he'll contend himself with making love to the tonic and gin, nights of bacchanalian revelry, the ogling, the wistful glances and the darned net search where most gals want a "educated, well behaved, employed, not hypocritical, proper background, intelligent,self confident, caring, fun, should not have any bad habits" etc etc... ! All fine and understood, no offense meant.. though, who in his right senses would proclaim that he's a hypocrite of the nth order, has no civility, has distant filial links with Veerapan's clan, is a complete dud in many aspects and cant get his eyes off the Stocks N Shares every day..Hmm, moot issues..Is there a complete package and then some ?? Vayoow.. what Women Want!

Else, there's the liberal guy ever looking to make his mark, but sadly not happening:( Single Income ya, Freudian Philosophies, (pls click on it) just doesnt know the right moves, can't get the chastity belt off yet.. Keep at it dude, apna haath jagannath, life's a highway, keep gunning :)

Or just the plain and married pandu whose missus wont have anything to do with it, the separated folks, the married guy working in a different country, place and being the breadwinner etc.. I have no idea about the SINS women folk here.. ! :)

SINS guys, you need Love Potion No 9 , you should be good soon ..

DITS :
You guys rock literally :) To be looked upon to be emulated, to walk the walk and talk the talk.. Need no counsellers, no fixed time, impromptu, evangelic to the cause perhaps...Is there anything called too much of a good thing ?? You could care less.. DILS, DIMS sometime maybe..

SITS:
Again, if single in life, the guy is on a bandwagon and those are the best days of his life.. If betrothed or married, well, it ain't bad either and no one's complaining.. Dream On, Dream On. SILS, SIMS sometime maybe..??

ZENS: ( Zero Income, No Sex)

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The definition of a Zen frm the dictionary.

A school of Mahayana Buddhism that asserts that enlightenment can be attained through meditation, self-contemplation, and intuition rather than through faith and devotion and that is practiced mainly in China, Japan, Korea, and Vietnam. Also called Zen Buddhism.

To figure out something by meditation or by a sudden flash of enlightenment. Originally applied to bugs, but occasionally applied to problems of life in general. "How'd you figure out the problem?" "Oh, I zenned it."

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Assuming they are looking for employment, the ZENS might at first glance look the sorry type..But no, they can be cool, savvy, great to get along with as a rule.... Coz I was one of them for a looong time and I kinda liked being the tapori.. well, we are trying, so please spare a thought.. and a few dimes.. and its not like they werent in SINS, DINS, DITS zone.. The wheels might have just come off for a lil while, or heck they might be on a sabbatical... Dont judge em yet, they are the bestest many times.. !! My vote's been with such types frm long ....somethin to do with the common take of rooting for the underdogs..Go, ZENS...!

Hmm, so much flippant stuff to bawl out on a weary Friday...
20 hrs straight, no sleep...

Whats with Women though ?? What do they want !!

Quotes frm ppl :
"Muki,10 yrs aaythu madve aagi, i know better half still 10 % only..!! "
"Maga, 3 yrs aaythu, inna I think I need to learn lot about her "...
"Mukunda, ninge artha aagala adella, halakke bidre gothagadu "..
This wise guy was very cryptic , didnt reveal a tad !!
" Experience maama, no substitute for it... Im still understanding and I cant.. Huh..??".
" 3 months aste guru, it feels like a lifetime and i feel the heat "
"Ayyabba, yaak kelthya..how did god create them such..Parallel lines atleast might meet at infinity,namdu avrdu mindset, sigh... divergent"

etc etc etc ....

O Reilly's- Women: The Complete Reference,
Sams -Teach Yourself Women in 21 days,
A Step-by-Step guide to Women by Rose Mary Maaro....
nowhere to be found, not happening at all ?!!

Right now, im in SINS mode and none the worse off..
none the better off too :(
sixpence richer maybe, but none the wiser :)
On conditions of anonymity or otherwise, care to poll your zones/groups here .. ?? :)
Or whatever opinions.... all in good fun ONLY, no insinuations on my part at all, ditto with u...